Electronic Sparks: Imogen Heap Speaks for Herself

IMOGEN HEAP: SPEAK FOR YOURSELF

SCORE: 100/100 - 10 - PERFECT SCORE

'Speak for Yourself' manages to be oh so intimidating despite its gentle, almost timid nature - and maybe the sheer genius of Heap being something so unnaturally difficult to come close to is what makes it such a stunner from the very moments the album is introduced with. 

The songs on Heap's second album are tastefully arranged, with plucky strings, synths, and elements of glitch that give this album a sound you won't find anywhere else. It's immediately apparent just how truly talented she is - and this album works as her magnum opus with songs like 'Goodnight and Go' and 'Hide and Seek' working as ideas that may have almost been too "out there"; but they managed to work better than ever. The way that she applied herself and her skillset within this album is something no other artists could ever come close to - and it manages to birth the lovechild of so many experimental artists into one brand new entity that not even the founders could possibly compete with; and it's not like anyone would even dare to. 

It's personal while having enough depth to tell relatable stories for any listener; but it's clear that the album is from the deepest depths of Heap's soul - making this album an immediate immersive experience from the first, harsh notes of 'Headlock' to the gentle and shy melodies of 'Goodnight and Go'. It's love and doubt in all of the places you'd expect to find them - and there are unexpected glances in every cold road. 

For an album released over two decades ago, 'Speak for Yourself' is eternally timeless. An album being this ahead of its time even now is a shocking feat, and it's no understatement that this album still feels like a work from the future - even by today's standards. Any time you might think the album will take a dip, it doesn't. It remains entirely consistent while making sharp, precise moves to keep the project interesting and deeply atmospheric throughout its entire runtime. It doesn't waste any time getting started - and it doesn't take any missteps along the way.

The songs are deeply mechanical and almost robotic in their compositions without being flat - if robots were given the heart and soul of humans and put into an orchestra of sounds and raw vulnerability. 

Despite being known for the more experimental and entirely vocal-based 'Hide and Seek' songs like 'Loose Ends' and 'Goodnight and Go' make this album truly worthwhile, and there isn't a single dull moment that drags it down. The artistic vision and consistency of this album is something that is truly impossible to ever put into words, and it's entirely captivating. 

'Speak for Yourself' has moments that are truly heartbreaking while mixing in sweet moments of hope and nervousness, crushes and loss all in one - but it never loses its spark. The album never loses steam and remains surprising, with each new track and each turn of events leaving a listener grasped deeply in the cold, comforting claws of every single melody. There is a level of cohesion here that becomes even more impressive given just how experimental this album truly is, and it's something that no other artist could ever come close to replicating. 

The album was composed while keeping a graph of where songs stood on an X and Y axis basis, ensuring that Heap would never duplicate the same song structure in any of the songs. Despite each song being almost too unique to be on the same album, it flows together magnificently. Everything comes together in such a spellbinding manner while still keeping the songs individual enough to work both inside and out of the album, and it's one of the core strengths that makes this album deserve even more praise than what it already gets. 

Surely it would seem impossible for such a young artist to practically invent a new form of art, but Heap did just that with every single song throughout the two-year journey it took her to compose 'Speak for Yourself' - writing and producing the album herself while enlisting help from very few individuals for small tasks. It's a work of love and pain that took her between her twenty-sixth and twenty-seventh birthdays, and the result was one of the most important albums the world has ever gotten. The artistic value alone of this album takes it above and beyond anything else, and the true musical value of it all makes it so much more worth it. 

There are elements of indietronica, rock, glitch, electronic, that are infused with art and electropop that all come together into something entirely consuming, and every new genre added hits the mark better than many artists who specialize in the fields that Heap merely dabbled in. 

Heap's unique technologies and innovative approaches to her music make her albums more than just your average piece of music. They're interactive pieces of art, taking you though her minds and inner wirings until you are completely wrapped up in the fabrics of the album. It's cold and soft all at the same time without ever being discomforting, and it's a comfortable, bittersweet sorrow that shows both isolation and happiness and just how quickly the moments flicker in and out. 

Few albums are truly ethereal in each note, but this album manages to do just that. It's entirely magnetic. 

~~ ~~~~~~~

Winter takes over and leaves you cold, heartbroken, confused - but there are lights, glimmers, and flashes of something brighter along the way. They keep you going, the people along the way making you whole again, complete, but is the journey ever complete? You find love, you lose it, you start over again, and you try, and try, and you try all over again. 

There are the moments of warmth, shelter - you find it all, drag it with you, but will it stick? Maybe you're isolated, or maybe it's just the cold. Who really knows? Everything rapidly changes, chopping up into fragments the sweet and the completely empty, the scary, the harsh, and the quick. But maybe everything will work out - maybe everything is meant to be this way. It's an everlasting whirlwind that you can't seem to get a grip of, but what is there to do other than try? 

It's intense but you hold on. You have to. Maybe you don't know where you're going yet - will you ever? There's too many questions that come with the journey, it leaves you dazed, heart pounding, mouth dry from the long-spanning rollercoaster of emotions, but is it meant to be this way? 

Your plans haven't gone how you meant them to, and everything spins. It's almost too much to realize, let alone process all at once. But you have to. You have to let it ring and pound through your head until you get it. You have to try. Again. Again. Again. It all comes together. It starts to make sense - or does it? 

It's life, after all! 

~~~~~

HEADLOCK. 

Complex, slowly building and arranging soft strings and blissful moments before exploding into harsh, sharp hits that will make this song strike the hardest, 'Headlock' is without a doubt one of the most defining songs of 'Speak for Yourself' - it perfectly encapsulates both the sharper and softer edges of the album while showcasing all sides of Heap's artistry and personal style, and it feels like a blue futuristic escape that carries out themes of love and wandering; as if you are lost before finding it again.

One of the things that makes the song so incredible is the deeply unique, yet consistent and fitting switches in pace and tone that the track goes through. It shifts and switches from harsh and intense to soft and lingering, and it makes fleeting feelings come together into one sharp-witted track that opens the album on the most ambitious note possible. It's dark and atmospheric while being something more; and it's one of the album's best despite being so early on. 

The sides of optimism and pessimism battle for their rights and thoughts on 'Headlock', and each turn in the path will determine which side wins; and maybe they can both manage to act together as one massive, brute force. It controls and manages every task, every feeling - but it provides a sense of regulation despite it all. 

It's all about breaking free from negative habits, coming out of your shell and allowing for positivity to finally come back in - and it lets the light of track two feel that much more lush as each note flourishes. There is a cycle that must be broken, with the narration of this track speaking to an outside individual who is stuck in a constant loop of their own sorrows. It continues the trail of misery that they believe is too far gone to fix; but the narrator sees through it and sees room for change. 

The individual refuses change and believes that what was wanted by them has already been lost, and its a drastic track that details how they threw away passion and interest for compromise and a loop of misery. It's laced in negativity while the two sides fight - and maybe the individual who is "stuck" will take over the rest of the album's core narration. 

It's a losing battle that might just make it, and there is always room for change - but it's willingness that drives us all into doing the things we do. There is a sense of opportunity despite the harsh nature of which it is brought upright, and there might just be something that can be done. The album is transferred from the original narrator to the one who held the potential, and it begins to tell her story instead.

Allowing for negativity to flourish will only keep you locked up - stuck, impossible to move,

until you change it and free yourself into new directions. 

Make the change, fix the habits, 

come out of them, 

come out stronger; better, reformed. 

Let yourself be whole again, it's truly never impossible. 

~~~~~

goodnight and go… 

The advice of 'Headlock' comes together in 'Goodnight and Go' - finally allowing for love and attraction to come through while still being in a sense of denial. It's a heavy crush that won't let up, one that is denied and repressed; but the magnetic crosses of love overbear, creating for the album's softest and most romantic track in its subtle, yet complex nature. 

It's soft and almost timid - feeling shy and bubbly in a childlike manner that is elevated by the toy theme of the music video that accompanies it. This track provides a kind of vulnerability that isn't seen in many other places throughout the album. It's bright and hopeful, and it truly does reflect on the feelings of finally letting the light into your life.

There is still a sense of denial, almost carefulness - but something more stubborn persists despite it all. It keeps up and shows the persona that is being created through each soundscape, and it starts to let up through the airy sound that the track provides through its production. 

Finally the individual lets go and follows after the one she loves - the light in her life may have been here all along, and she starts to let the mask of the misery fade into something sweeter. The cracks become laced with something more naïve and hopeful, and this track works as one of the most positive moments throughout the entire album where the tactics on 'Headlock' actually served their time and brought the "character" of the album to where they now stand. 

Letting go will free the soul - and letting the one who's most important to you in will save you.

Love will drive; and it heals.

~~~~~

HAVE YOU GOT IT IN YOU? 

'Have You Got It in You?' is crystalized and compressed while building and gravitating to the wintery heights that the album continues to face as it progresses. It's a track that is based on interpretation through intentionally vague writing that still remains highly direct, and there is a sense of change and confusion throughout the track that shows that steps may have been taken fast; maybe the change wasn't right, or maybe it's just adjusting to it that is striking with such immense levels of difficultly. 

The calm didn't last, and it led to something much more hurried and fear-inducing. The song becomes more frantic and layered as the depth and uncertainty become more clear; and the narrator now starts to question herself. Maybe she didn't have the potential that other's thought she could manage so well - maybe she's right back to where she started. 

All the hard work starts to seem lesser and lesser to her - and her achievements don't feel like anything at all to her. The slump continues as things become confusing and more difficult to navigate - it's as if nothing makes sense anymore. It crumbles down further and further. 

Maybe there's nothing that can be done.

Will it always be like this? 

~~~~~

LOOSE ENDS..

One of the most energetic and bright tracks on the album, 'Loose Ends' is delightfully inviting and full of fun while still being introspective and suiting the story that is provided by the album. 

This track has Heap's sweetest vocal performances that make it exceptionally worthwhile, and it's one of the most strikingly gorgeous tracks on the album due to the atmosphere and changes it has. It feels sweet and bubbly like 'Goodnight and Go', but it's something much darker on the inside. 

It paints a reflective surface that is crisp and pleasant to everyone else, but the narrator knows what goes on behind closed doors through the infidelity and heartbreak that the relationship "provides" to her. There are loose ends that can be tied and used for something better, but her partner isn't who she thought they were - instead they're disappointing, letting her down and breaking promises while going behind her back and hurting her more and more; but she hasn't broken yet. They try again, she lets it happen, gives more chances. 

Things were less amazing than they seemed at the beginning of it all, the butterflies wore off and so did the honeymoon phase - and now the relationship is left in confusion as the narrator tries to understand what situation she has gotten herself into. Maybe she is content with all of the negativity still, but it comes back hauntingly quick.

The relationship drained and took more than she had bargained for, but that's life, isn't it? They are growing apart by the minute as the clock never stops ticking, and there is something that should be done - but it's never done.

Things are complicated, things work and then they don't. 

But this is living. 

~~~~~

hide and seek.

The pain starts and becomes something more. It all comes together now, it all hits at once - the breaking point is reached and it's reached hard. All of the pain and confusion coming together into the emotional breakdown taken by the narrator, ceasing the whirlwind into something eerily quiet and soft that carries out the mess that has been made. It's a kind of pain without rage, without blame; instead, it's isolation, tears, silence, numbness. 

As the relationship continues to wither away, so does she. Every piece of her becoming darker and darker and reverting her back into the same patterns once more. The potential was wasted again - and now the feeling of never being able to go back is even more severe than ever. 

Maybe they can't go back. 

But maybe it'll keep happening - surely something will work, right? 

* * * 

From a technical standpoint, the song is about Heap's parents divorcing and how she witnessed it as a child, reflecting on the isolation and the feeling of her world being torn from under her feet at a young age. On that day, her childhood was forever changed, and the memories haunted her and lingered on into something that managed to become one of the longest-lasting wounds she has been put through over her years. 

~~~~~

CLEAR THE AREA.

The care remains in a time of crisis on 'Clear the Area', as the narrator attempts to get her lover out of a substance induced high/reaction (either alcoholic or drug induced), providing safety and care despite the pain she has been put through by them - but there is a sense of frustration through the track's thumping beat. 

Despite being about coming down and clearing things up, there is a sense of harshness that makes it feel oh so temporary. The pity is leaving, and instead the narrator starts to see all of the disgraceful behaviour done by her partner; and sure she'll care for them despite it all, but there is a resentment full of rage brewing inside of her being with every slip. 

As it continues to build, the relationship continues to break further and further again. Nothing has changed, and it's starting to become more and more apparent that things have gone horribly wrong.

It's as if this is only the beginning despite it all. 

Something is shifting once again, and the anger begins before the sorrow can hit again. 

~~~~~ 

DAYLIGHT ROBBERY! 

It explodes. All of the rage and emotions packed inside and bottled up come out on 'Daylight Robbery', and the rock-infused track creates a hypnotically surprising blend that seems improbable; but it works even better after considering the rest of the album and how things have come to this point. 

But despite all of the anger lingering in each riff, there is a sense of fulfillment as the narrator finally lives her life without obstacle. She begins to live her life to the fullest while taking the advantages in front of her; and she's breaking the chains that bound her for so long for once - but not for all.

Things start to look up again after the events at the party that took place during 'Clear the Area', and there is more potential for something much bigger for the narrator to take - it's full of ecstasy  and feelings of adrenaline rushing through her soul; but there seems to be a deeply-rooted issue with following up potential in the narrator's life. 

Temporary highs make up for the most blissful of moments,

but it isn't long until the patterns repeat themselves once more. 

~~~~~

THE WALK. 

After the party is over and the bliss subsides, all that's left is the walking realization of who she has to come back to - maybe she wants to still, something pulls her back time and time again, but she shouldn't be there despite this. It continues again and again.

She details how well she was finally doing again as the crushing weight of it being taken from her once again hits harder than ever before. The situation worsens and she realizes that things aren't how she had wanted on a much larger scale, realizing that she shouldn't be there and that she needs to escape - but she can't. There's something stuck, and the chances for change outweigh the feelings that the loneliness would bring. 

It all begins to feel suffocating, as if everything were a trap for the entire time. Is there any way of knowing? It continues, bringing her back again. Repeating the patterns, going back to the "headlock" she was once in; but under a new crutch after even more lost potential brings her to her absolute highest breaking point. 

The feelings change and flicker,

and what's left is everything you wished you had never felt. 

Dilemma begins.

~~~~~

just for now...

And just for the time being, she allows it all again. Tries it again. Tries to get it to work.

Was the situation hopeless? Maybe not, but things start to become soft again. As if a feather-light apology has drifted everything back into the state it was meant to be. She gets what she wants, tries to be happy; but there is still something sinisterly bittersweet that lingers on every note. 

Just for a little while, she allows the hopelessness to be replaced with something brighter - letting family visits amongst the holiday season soothe her damaged soul and cracked exterior for now. 

But it's only for now. 

She starts to feel trapped again and wants out, being drowned out by the lights and ushering voices before coming back to the realizations she hated to face.

~~~~~

I AM IN LOVE WITH YOU...! 

The tenth track of the album works as one of the most diverse, providing changes over a synth-heavy beat that feels highly influenced by deeper grooves of dance-pop and house amongst other electronic subgenres. It details being in love before the seconds it changes; changing from 'I Am in Love With You' to "I'm not in love with you" within a simple instant. 

Things are repaired for a moment before they come to a close again, and it's hard to choose which side wins in the battle of love and hate. 

But there's something much more sinister, as the love is something that is only brought on in the cause of manipulation as the narrator is forced into intimate situations she was not ready for - and when she says no? The partner says they do not love her anymore. 

The narrator is blamed for "not being ready" and getting into "situations she can't handle" while her partner pressures her and uses love as if it were a currency; and maybe it was a currency that was never there. The manipulation tactics on this song are written in a very realistic manner that makes the song tense when you realize what it is about, and everything changes once you are introduced to the horrors that lie beneath it. 

It's coaxing in the most horrific portrayal imaginable, and the writing on this track is some of the album's most striking in the way it manages to be so eerily realistic in every moment. 

Manipulation seals the lock tighter, and maybe nothing was as it started to seem.

~~~~~

closing in. 

Breakbeat-esque drums and a patterning similar to drum and bass make 'Closing In' one of the album's most striking and surprising tracks, and it starts to bring the story to a close while still making room for more. It's an almost frantic track that is slowed and soothed by Heap's layered and soft vocals, and it feels like a truly claustrophobic experience - but one you've learnt to accept in the end. 

Despite all of the abuse, the frantic nature of need becomes deeper and deeper. The narrator starts to yearn even more, wanting to stay, wanting to go back to everything as her feelings "close in" while she is tied in a cycle of abuse - it's a loop that always winds up in this path, and it's one she can't seem to get herself out of.

As her cravings harshen, so does the track's composition, and it's clear that there is a form of aggression that is starting to come from both ends of the relationship. It's a double-sided blade where no one can let go - and the attachment starts to stem.

It overwhelms, captivates. 

Keeping you in. 

Locked once more. 

~~~~~

the moment i said it. 

'Speak for Yourself' closes on a throat-tighteningly somber moment, with a stripped piano arrangement that truly does make the song feel like the end. It paints the picture clearly of the relationship that has provided both love and pain finally coming to a close, it's dark, full of echoes and a melody that becomes quicker and quicker - and it accurately puts the feelings on display in a way where the music feels like more than just a simple song. It's something so much more. 

They fight. Finally after so long spent being silent and keeping everything in, she speaks out. And the moment she says it - things begin to close. She says it's the end, but it's never really the end. They fight, they make up - but she doesn't forget, speaking on her partner's infidelity and actions throughout their relationship as the pieces start to crumble. But things come back as they always do - and they go back again. She sees her potential again and tries again before winding back into the cycle. 

But it isn't over, is it? Nothing truly is over. 

Over is a funny word. For something to be truly "over" - it must cease to exist, but nothing ever truly does. Love doesn't truly end, relationships and memories never truly just cease to exist. 

And there is a glimmer of hope embedded into the finer wiring of the track; it doesn't have to end. It doesn't have to be over. Everything can be replayed once more. 

Again,

and again, 

and again. 

Although it isn't a standard loop format in a technical sense (nor is it a concept album as I have managed to grasp it as), this album has the right parallels to work as a loop. It continues on from this point forward of a relationship pleading to be over, there is dislike, but there is still love. And it might just be too good to let go. It starts again with the dark, heavy ache of 'Headlock' before carrying into the shy, crushing 'Goodnight and Go' - and everything finally starts to make even more sense.

It's a loop of love and pain. The pain caused by the love. It details how it comes and goes, everything goes quiet and becomes new again before tumbling down; and the loop will go on as long as you let it carry out for.

And so it goes.